11 years on...

First dates are always memorable, particularly so for sentimentalists. One can forget the first time you lied to your parents, the very first expletive you used on a nemesis. But we never ever forget our first date - whether positively or otherwise.

The feelings of anxiety the night before, the innate fear of running out of topics, awkward moments of silences... Endless (and often unconfounded) worries that the ultimate cock-up will happen...

Exactly 11 years ago, I summoned the courage to invite a gal to watch a potential ultimate cock-up occur. I still remember it was a HCJC band concert. Now, I've never been a big fan of school bands, but then again, it didn't matter whether it was a band performance or a Hollywood movie - one wouldn't pay attention anyway. Not on a first date. =p

Thankfully, the ultimate cock-up didn't happen... and Qi Qi and I still hold that special evening close to our hearts. What makes today special would be that this would be our last "first date anniversary" together as singles (That's the thing with sentimentalists... anniversaries for everything! =p). By the time the next May 19 comes around, that would be our first "first date anniversary" together as a married couple!

I have only ever run 3 marathons in my life, all of which are memorable for unique reasons. There was the one in 2006, my inaugural attempt at completing the 42 km run. Then there was the one the following year when Qi Qi was there beside me throughout the run, with the excruciating pain in my knees afterwards forcing me into an early "retirement" from long distance running.

And of course there is the one which I have been running for 11 years now (how about that for stamina? =p) Shoulder to shoulder, stride for stride, with the one who has stood by me especially when the going was tough.

Come September, we would have reached another significant milestone along this journey.

But for sure, we will always be fully committed to finishing this lifelong race together.

Time waits for no one...

Ever since Jeff proposed, I got myself a new "hobby". That is reading up Singapore Brides and Style Weddings forums. Really useful sites to get ideas and advice for a wedding. Handy tips and experiences shared by BTBs. :)

I was reading the forums as usual yesterday... and realised how slow we were in terms of our solemnisation preparation. Many BTBs having Sept solemnisations this year have already sourced and booked their venues, Justice of Peace and some, even chosen and gotten their ROM dresses and photographers. I started to get worried, reason being that the date we have chosen is a popular one, 20/09/2009. Not to mention that the numeric term of the date and mth represents exactly the year, it is also a "ji re" and there is a public holiday on the next day. Some BTBs have also expressed difficulty in getting their JPs. Sigh.

Just how did things come to this stage? We had 1 year and 8 mths to prepare (since the proposal)! Other than visiting a shifu to decide on auspicious dates, booking a bridal shop which was practically done on the spur of moment last year, and receeing some venues this year, we did nothing else. Ok, I'm not totally right to say that. Jeff did collect some wedding package brochures, while I had been into my new hobby. Perhaps more accurate to say that there wasn't much concrete actions from these. We always assume there's tons of time, not knowing that time pass by so quickly.

And so, both of us started getting panicky yesterday. And decided that something must be done SOON in order to have our ideal ROM. We did spend the whole sat evening completing our pretty comprehensive solemnisation table and shortlisted 7 more venues that we would want to recce. But the venue needs to be confirmed asap so that we will get our first choice and to allow us to proceed to book the JP's time. And so we split the tasks on hand, Jeff took charge of planning our next recce trip in the shortest time possible and I in charge of consolidating a list of solemnisers with good reviews. For both of us, this sat shall be a hectic but excited excursion to 7 different garden places where we have never been to before. Sounds fun!

Btw, we also made our first call to Jazz Bridal (who moved!!) to book an appointment to look at the ROM dresses and suits. I'm certainly looking forward to that!

Recce Trip to Mandai Orchid Garden and Gardenasia

Finally some updates on our second recce trip on Vesak Day, 9th May 2009. We spent the Saturday afternoon recceing MOG and Gardenasia. On our way there, Jeff told me: “Dear, don’t expect that we will reach MOG very fast ok? The journey will take a while.” Well, the reason why he said this is because I often complain that the roads he chooses are often the longest. And my reply to him? “Yes, I know, Dear. Thanks for managing my expectations.:p”

About 10 mins into the ride, Jeff exclaimed “The road sign! See, Mandai Orchid Garden!” We were both too surprised as we didn’t expect the car ride to be a short one.

As we stepped into MOG, we were greeted with beautiful orchids. The feeling about the place was good.



We tried to find Gazebo and the water garden based on the photos we saw on the website. Here’s some photos of the solemnization venues:

We were in favor of both Gazebo and the water garden, both bearing their own merits.
Gazebo has a beautiful setting, surrounded by colourful orchids. Nice background for photography. The water garden gives an exclusive feel and can accommodate a bigger capacity.

We approached the Vanilla Pod restaurant next. The restaurant owner, Mr Wilson Yew, was helpful and answered some of our enquiries. The owner gave us assurance of the high quality western food his chef provides and it seems to us, at reasonable prices too. Accommodating 60 pax in the restaurant would be a tad too crowded, as we were told. Hence, difficult to include a screen as well. Other than this, we think this place will suit our garden theme wedding perfectly. Too bad.

We moved on to our next destination, Gardenasia, which is near Sungei Buloh Wetland Reserve. Dear wasn’t sure of the direction, after all we seldom wander to the northern part of Singapore. In the car ride, Dear asked me if we would be so lucky to again see the road sign “SBWR” in no time. “Got so near meh?” was my reply. You know what? Within the next few minutes, tada, we saw the SBWR sign. We couldn’t believe our eyes, we got the direction right! Today indeed was our lucky day.

The drive after seeing the sign, was deep in though. Inaccessible. Subconsciously, we started giving Gardenasia a low rating even before we reached there.

In a word, Gardenasia was disappointing. The frangipani venue, which looked so good in the website photos, has a huge tree entrenched in the middle where the guests sit. Quite out of place, isn’t it? Jeff felt that the place would be almost ideal had the tree not been there. I second that. And so, this venue for our solemnization is definitely out.

Recce Trip to Northern Singapore - Seletar Country Club

The last entry from Qi Qi provided the spur for us to move on to the next stage of our preparations - starting on recce trips to potential ROM venues to have a 'feel' of all venues on our shortlist. The past weeks have been hectic for me, to say the least - pre-exhibition work, 3 long days of exhibition, continuation of my projects covering 3 countries, brainstorming sessions to tackle the economic crisis, and losing the use of my room for one week =p

This shall not be used as an excuse of course. I decided to drop all my work for the day and focus solely on our preparatory work, since this was a rare day we could spend some time together working on our wedding.

Our first recce trip proved to be a long one - a 30 minute drive all the way to the northern part of Singapore, to an all-too-familiar place. Having spent 2 years of my life in Seletar Camp, getting to Seletar Country Club didn't prove to be too difficult, albeit it was deeper into the camp. In fact, the inaccessibility was something we both noted that reduced the appeal of the place. Even if shuttle services were to be provided, the nearest train stop was still a 15-minute ride away. Parking was ample though.

With no one to guide us around the place, we assumed the responsibility of being tour guides. We tried to match what we saw on the websites with what we actually came across on the ground - and being the resourceful chaps that we are, we naturally found Tavern & the Fountain Terrace on our own. And being the naturally-unconfident chaps that we are, we decided to do a double-check with the General Office. And we were lucky to have a very kind-hearted Indian security guard who willingly offered to show us all the potential solemnisation venues there are in SCC.

We went direct to Tavern first. The following are our comments regarding the place:

Qi Qi: "Tavern's too small. And dark. But the view is nice, and a major plus is that we have the whole place to ourselves. But it's a no, cos it is highly unlikely that we can accommodate 60+ people within the premises."
Jeff: "Tavern gave me a relaxed feel, a little bit of a rock-chic feel with the elevated stage and drum sets, and I rather liked the bar counter at the centre - it'd be cool to have this bar where guests could order their drinks from. But it'd be a no for me cos it doesn't satisfy my basic criteria of having an outdoor solemnisation."

Next up was the Fountain Terrace. It also overlooks the golf-course, except there's a nice fountain area in front of the eating area. Here's our comments:

Jeff: "It's definitely one notch higher than Tavern. The setting would be perfect especially if the weather holds up during the solemnisation. However, I do not really like the eating area just behind the Terrace. They would have to do a major spruce up of the place to make it cosier than it is now."
Qi Qi: "Think I personally like the Terrace more than the Tavern. A major plus point is Terrace's spacious area, with a fountain overlooking the greenery golf course. But the eating ground is not to my liking too, for one, it would not be exclusive to us only. :( "

Overall, both of us still feel positive about this place, and so we are not ruling out Seletar Country Club completely till we complete our recce trips. :p

**************************************************************
By the way, Qi Qi has something else to say:

Received 2 little presents from Dear today. :) Want to know what the gifts were? The answer is in the pics below:

So Dear has kept his promise of getting me a set of pyjamas. Yeah! And it surprised me with the good choice he has made - A really lovely comfy white sleepwear robe! Really can’t bear to wear it, hehe. Thanks Baby! :)

And of course, Jeff received something in return for his efforts...

Scouting for ROM venues

Dear and I have long decided that we would like to hold our solemnisation and wedding banquet separately. Well, you may wonder why. It’s kinda a compromise between the two of us. Jeff’s ideal marriage age is around 27 or so, while my preference has always been to marry later, closer to 30. So when Jeff proposed on 9th September 2007, we took the longest time to come to a consensus as to exactly when our big day be. “J: Do you think it is possible for us to get married during our 10th anniversary, 9th September 2008? Q: That date sounds good, but isn’t that too rush? We need to book hotel one year in advance lei. J: That’s true, we also don’t have our own place yet. How about the following, 9th September 2009, a nice date ya? Q: How about the year after? :) J: That’s wayyy too long…we will be 29 by then! Very old le. Why not we ROM on 090909, then banquet in 2010? Q: Great idea, I like that.” And so that’s the reason… :p

We had both been laid back towards our marriage preparations last year, well, not totally perhaps. I was enthusiastically researching on possible ROM venues after the proposal and Jeff, on the other hand, surprised me by going to different hotels personally to get hold of wedding packages brochures while I was away on a work trip overseas. Probably because of our busy work schedule and that we both knew that there’s still some time anyway before our big day, our eagerness and enthusiasm mellowed along the way. But come 2009, both of us were resolute to start again.

We have decided that the most pressing thing we need to do now is to source for our ROM venue. Both of us wanted a different feel (from a hotel) and again we were undecided. My initial idea was a beach wedding theme and best if it could be in Sentosa since that was where Jeff proposed to me (Ha, maybe I should talk about the proposal in my next write-up). Where as for Jeff, he preferred somewhere serene, like a garden wedding accompanied by a lake or pond. We were both open to either a beach or garden wedding, and so we began researching on the different possible venues. Jeff came up with a rating template to rate the different venues, and I shall include it in my next write up once we have completed our analysis. :) We had also came up with our guest list, and to our dismay, despite stringent listing of only relatives and close friends, the list came up to 68 to be exact. Too many relatives, haha. To think that we initially wanted a really small private solemnization. Well, it still can be cozy though.

With more research on the venues, I began to like more and more of Jeff’s idea of a garden themed wedding. Anyway, I discovered that Sentosa beach wedding is definitely out of our budget, the cheapest package will make us poorer by $98+ per pax. Crazy. I had more time on my hands lately and so decided to spend more time in the research. Had the chance to read comments from other BTBs too. Shall mention about 3 garden-themed venues that I took a liking to:

1) Gardenasia (http://www.gardenasia.com/)
Jeff and I took a liking to Gardenasia as soon as we saw the pictures online. Here’s for your preview:

It offers 2 countryside frangipani solemnization packages. The cheaper of the 2, Latris package, offers the following at $2288+, inclusive of a cocktail reception. The other, Limonium package was priced at $2688+ - the only difference is that this has a buffet reception, with a sit-down dining. Well, depending on the package, this comes up to be $57+ or $67+ per pax. A far cry from a bride (whom I got to know online) who paid $1888 for the Limonium package only a few months back in 2008! :( Another constraint to this venue is the size, it caters nicely to 40 pax, any more would seem a tad too crowded…But the set-up is really enticing, isn’t it? Also, it makes up for its inaccessible location by providing shuttle bus! So well, we shall go down to recee first before concluding.

2) Seletar Country Club (http://www.seletarclub.com.sg/)
Seletar Country Club as a venue for solemnization seems not a bad idea too. Look at these pics:

It offers a really attractive package:
Sumptuous buffet menu prepared by our Chefs
- Free flow of fruit punch throughout your event
- Floral Pedestals & centerpiece for your solemnization table
- Waiver of Corkage Charges for Host brought in Hard Liquor (Duty Paid)
- Two VIP parking lots in front of our Club Lobby for your bridal cars (subject to availability)
- Complimentary self parking facilities for all your invited guests
- Unique wedding favors for all your invited guests
- White chair covers provided for all chairs
- Special pricing for purchase of house wines by bottles & beer by barrel

Its high tea solemnization package cost $38++ per pax, and lunch package at $42++ per pax. Tavern should be able to accommodate 50 pax or so. I have also heard many good reviews about the place and coordinator - very flexible and much room for negotiations. Shall find out more when we do a recee. :)

3) Mandai Orchid Garden (http://www.mandai.com.sg/)

This place is really captivating; in fact, the one I like the most for now. Jeff still doesn’t know this yet. Hehe.
Gazebo

Watergarden Seems like their website is not updated regularly. Anyway, I got the info from them and am quoted the following:

Solemnisation in the Garden Package
- free flow of sof drinks
- free Gazebo setup for solemnization (if required)
- free entry and parking to all guests
- choice of dining venues (based on capacity) plus basic decorations
- elegant white seat covers for all chairs
- complimentary usage of Bridal Room
- complimentary of invitation cards (60% based on guaranteed number of guests)
- Solemnization at Water Garden @ S$400++

High Tea Package:
S$45++ per pax (Weekdays) -Monday To Thursday
S$48++ per pax (Weekends) -Friday to Sunday

Cocktail Package:
S$50++ per pax

Brunch Package:
S$60++ per pax (Weekdays) -Monday To Thursday
S$65++ per pax (Weekends) -Friday to Sunday

Buffet Lunch Package:
S$55++ per pax (Weekdays) -Monday To Thursday
S$65++ per pax (Weekends) -Friday to Sunday

Buffet Dinner Package:
S$65++ per pax (Weekdays) -Monday To Thursday
S$75++ per pax (Weekends) -Friday to Sunday

Similar to Gardenasia, the prices package has ballooned quite a lot over the past few years. One plus point about this place is that it can take more than 50 people and offers a less than 50m walk to its air-conditioned restaurant.

Shall update more in my next write-up. Tata.

Qi's current mood

Of trials and tribulations

Qi Qi and I have been seriously sifting through wedding forums and reviewing all potential ROM sites in recent weeks - and we are quickly zooming in on a few nice places already. In particular, Gardenasia caught our eye for its lush, surreal, and er, garden setting. Kudos to Qi Qi especially for her persistent enquiries to the Gardenasia staff!

It's mid-April, my deadlines for the 2 projects are closing down on me! Sometimes feel a little overwhelmed, but my problems are nothing compared to what my dear Qi Qi is facing now. It has been a difficult period for her, and while I have been trying to provide all the emotional support, I still feel that I have not given enough. Deep down in my heart, I have an inkling that a miracle is on the horizon, and I sure hope I will be proven right.

It is a testing period definitely, and I will do my absolute utmost to protect my precious baby.

My fond Valentine memories...

This blog is 2 weeks old, and although there has not been much practical progress in relation to our wedding preps, it must be said that we have taken large strides on the emotional front.

The last few days have been a testing period for me work-wise, but Qi Qi has been doing an absolutely fantastic job keeping my chin up and providing me all the support that my bruised-and-battered confidence has been calling out for.

And what better way to boost a guy's morale than through his stomach?

I wasn't in want of Cupid's arrow striking me on St Valentine's Day, but rather looking for some quiet time alone with Qi Qi to make up for all that we'd missed out on due to our work schedules. And I certainly got more than I bargained for...

Shepherd's Pie! My photography skills certainly doesn't do justice to her culinary skills, because it tasted absolutely superb! And coming from someone as gastronomically fussy as I am, this compliment is certainly of the highest order... =p Yummy!

Not forgetting the well-concealed surprise that Qi Qi sprang on me - a photo-taking session as a prelude for the real session.

More on that in the next post... =p

An Unforgettable Birthday

The series of events that took place during my 28th birthday was surely a memorable one. Dear sprang not just one but three surprises for me.

Surprise 1: Dear caught me unaware by coming over to my place when the clock striked 00:00, and celebrated my birthday with me with a pretty small heart-shaped cake. This is unlike previous years where we celebrated only towards the end of the day. I was next presented with an unusual present – the creation of this website. This is something I have never ever thought Dear would take the initiative to do, for he is really a private person. I still remember vividly we had a conversation a few years back and he shared that he would prefer things to be done privately and not shared in public, and hence probably explained why the proposal was a private one. So could you imagine the surprised look on my face that night? =P Anyway, the start of this website shall symbolize the active start of our marriage preparation plans!

Surprise 2: Jeff celebrated my birthday with me for the second time, this time at night with my family. Here’s when he surprised me with another present – A really pretty Coach tote bag. I really appreciate the fact that Jeff noticed that I have been searching for a tote bag for quite a long while. Also, knowing how fussy I can be when it comes to bags, Dear took pains to look for one that is to my liking, in terms of design, size and colour. Thanks, baby! Made the effort

Surprise 3: Jeff brought me to Blue Lobster Seafood Restaurant the next day. Pretty good ambience and fresh seafood served.

Everything was so well-planned and well-concealed. Thanks, Dear! These incidences of happiness shall be retained as beautiful memories in my hippocampus.

PS: Of course, the wonderful home-prepared steamboat dinner with my family (plus presents from them too!) and surprises from my colleagues added to the wonderful memories to my 28th birthday.

Foreword

Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness.

I decided to begin this private space with this quote, as I find that it aptly and amply describes why 2 people who fall in love can choose to come together, settle down, spend much of their lives entwined in each others' ups & downs and still live happily ever after.

Happiness, to me, is not a destination; neither can it ever be a goal that one sets out to achieve. Having met the one that I love relatively early in my life, I have been fortunate to be enlightened to the fact that happiness is the experience of being able to trek the road of life, kinks & bumps et al, with the hand of your loved one tightly clasped in yours...

This personalized blog was created for 2 reasons. Without any qualms, 2009 will be a big year for us. Or rather, I should say it is a mammoth year for us. At the turn of the year, I set for myself some resolutions which I said I was hell-bent on achieving during the course of the year. And #1 on that list was to shake off my lethargy, overcome the inertia and start to be more pro-active in our marriage preparation plans. With that in mind, I decided to create a space here that would bring more organization and commitment on my part, a space where we could set key milestones, compare prices & settings, and more importantly, to document our feelings & experiences during the course of our stairway to haven.

Which leads us to the 2nd reason - a private space that would serve as a memento for us many years down the road, when we could reminisce our matrimonial union process. Ultimately, my vision is for this blog to serve us beyond the preparational period, throughout our lifetime as a married couple.

So, here it is, a site dedicated to...us.